Microsoft XP : Bihar Edition

Another Hindi Post. Sorry for those of you who are poor at hindi (Shanty) or who dont know hindi. For those who know Bihar and Hindi this is not one to be missed. :p

Chandni Chowk to China: A Question of Answers

India is the flavor of the season currently. And keen on adding tadka to the flavor, Rohan Sippy, Warner Bandhu and Nikhil Advani bring India’s first transnational film, ‘Chandni Chowk to China.’ Many among you have written to PFC imploring that this important milestone needs to be rigorously analyzed. Bowing to popular demand, we sent a note to Professor Armando Trilokesh Minimovich Yadav (Prof. A.T.M. Yadav). For more on Prof. A.T.M. Yadav, see here and here. However, we were disappointed to learn that he is touring the boondocks of China at this time. Nevertheless, our intrepid reporter travelled to China to file this interview for the readers of PFC.

Read the awesomely witty interview here!

Ek Shanivaar

18th January 2009, Sunday

0312hrs, Couch.

Abhi thodi der pehle mai suchit ko Night rider bus stop dikha ke ghar wapas aa raha tha ki mazedaar hadsa hua. Mujhe apne ghar aane ke liye beech mein ek multistorey car park main 3 manzil upar aana padhta hai jiske liye har dafa lift hi le leta hoon. Har baar ki tarah aaj bhi mai lift ki taraf bada.

Ab 10-15 metre ki doori mein lift nazar aa raha tha aur mere aur lift ke beech mein ek chapta tha jo bhi lift ki taraf ja raha tha. Woh lift mein ghusa aur meri taraf muda, main 3 metre se bhi kam ki doori mein tha aur mujhe laga saala mere liye lift ka darwaza khula rakhega. Usne meri taraf dekha aur jaldi se lift bandh karne ka  button daba diya. Saala Chutiya Chapta, haraami, m******……. aisi kaafi gaaliyan mere mann mein aayi. Ek hi jhatke mein mai seedi ki taraf bhaaga jo mere bagal mein hi thi! Maine yeh thhan li thi ke mein usse pehle upar pahunch jaoonga aur saale ka chehra dekhoonga.

Main poori tezi se aur apne lambe taangon ka fayada uthate hue seediyon se upar bhaaga. Mai usse 2-3 second pehle pahunch gaaya aur uska lift se nikalne ka intazar karne laga. Lift ka darwaaza dheere se khula aur woh bahar nikla aur mujhe dekhte hi chaunk ke wahin ruk gaya. Maine uski taraf dekha aur nana patekar ki tarah hasne laga… Mujhe lagta hai chutiya darr gaya tha. Woh jaldi se muda aur doosri taraf nikal gaya. Saala chapta, aukaad dikha di maine uski. Aur phir mai mast ghar wapas aa gaya. bahut mazaa aaya uski lene main…

Iske alaava bhi aaj kaafi kuch huya. Subah utha…dophar ko shaayad…haan dophar ko hi…1 baje ke kareeb. Phir thodi der aise hi tv dekha aur phir tayyar ho ke NUS ke liye nikal gaya. Aaj NUS ke cricket team ka chayan tha isliye mai bhi chala gaya. Suchit bhi shaam ko NUS aane waala tha. Cricket khela. Shaam huyi aur tab tak suchit bhi aa chuka tha, hum dono gaye aur PGPR mai faadoo bharateeya khaana khaaya. Uske baad maine suchit ko thoda NUS dikhaya, library gaye, bollywood pe ek kitab bhi maine le li aur uske baad GSS room mein ja kar baith gaye. Thodi der padhai ki aur phir youtube mai kuch video dekhe.  Uske baad bus leke mere ghar aa gaye.

Neeche food court mein khaana pack karva liya tha aur phir ghar aa gaye. Khaane ke saath philum(chalchitra) bhi dekhne lage… ” A wednesday” dekhi …badiya pitchar hai yaar…mai doosri baar dekh raha tha! Yeh scene sabse sahi tha:

Uske baad hum Night rider ki bus stop ke taraf gaye…Jaise hi hum pahunchne waale the bus nikal gayi…agli bus aane ko 20-25min the isliye humne socha jaake chai pee lete hain. Pata nahi phir thoda sa mijaaz badla aur hum 7-eleven chale gaye..suchit ne Hot Chocolate le liya aur maine rang birangi barf waali ice-cream le li. Thodi der hum bus stop pe duniya daari ki baatein karte rahe, suchit choclate ki chuskiyaan lete hue aur main apne barf ko chooste hue.. Phir bus aayi aur chote sahab nikal gaye aur uske baad lift mein kya hua aap jaante hi hain.

Ghar aaya socha gaane sunoonga…saale vishnu ne phir mere kamre se mera external hard disk le liye. chutiya lene se pehle poochta bhi nahi hai. Har roj jab ghar aata hun to sota rahta hai aur mera hard disk kamre mein rakh kar darwaza bandh kar leta hai. Aaj maine use msn  pe gaali- galoch bhej di hai hai ki abse meri cheezein aise na liya kare…Saala chain se mujhe apni cheezein bhi istamaal nahin karne de raha…

Aaj ke liye  kaafi hai..Tho yeh tha mera Shani-vaar. Ab dekhte hain ravi-vaar kaise jaayega.

0349ghante, Wahin pe

18th Janvari 2009, Ravivaar.

The week gone by – an update.

17th january 2009, Saturday

0131hrs, Home.

First of all sorry that I havent been posting anything for quite some time now. Today finally I have got some time to just recap the week gone by briefly.

Monday. Classes started at Uni. Also some work for GSS. I designed the new poster for Welcome Party (posted it on tuesday). My classes are in evening from 6 to 9. First class was good, Indian Prof, SK Panda. Didnt go to gym…so decided to workout at home. I am using suitcases,bags etc as weights at home now :p . Not bad actually…they are pretty effective, basically, the tougher it is to grasp a weight, the more your muscle develops. Btw turns out that cute girl I mentioned in my post last friday is one of my friend’s roomie. I was warned by my friend to stay away from her. I saw that girl on that day, but didnt bother to go say hi. I was late for class anyways.

Tuesday. Second class for the week- Power Electronics. Again Panda. Nice chap, turns out he is deputy head of Mechatronics Masters Program. I am thinking of asking him for part-time research assistant job. Need some cash urgently. Stupid NUS -Office of Finance are not returning my 1000 bucks of tuition grant refund! Once poster was done I uploaded it everywhere..the facebook group..my blog…forum…etc.Naweed and me decided to make a robot.

Wednesday. Third class in a row.Damn it. Application of Mechatronics. Horrible Prof. Cant understand what he is talking. The man needs speech therapy and english classes! I ignored him and read some Robotics book and messaging Ankita all the while. I dont think she knew I was in class. :p I left class half way when he gave a break, Naveed the sincere student he is, decided to sit through 2 more hours of  nerve-twisting torture.Left for library and worked on some business plan. Got back home around 11 and did some bullshit for sometime and then went to bed.

Thursday. Yes. Fourth Class. Neural Networks.Awesome Prof. Best Lecture Notes I have seen in my life as a student here. Agastya (minus long hair + ear stud + spikes) arrives. Earlier in the day he had called and said he would be coming for class. I was surprisingly not surprised at his new appearance. Dont know Y? During this lecture prof showed two videos which I would like to share here. Real interesting stuff!

Came back home and did some exercise. Then watched telugu movie ‘ Vaana’ . Good songs and locations. Nothing else positive in the movie.  Havent been able to watch live cricket matches since classes started. So i watch one hour highlights every night at 1:32am on Star Cricket. Now has become a routine.

Friday: No registered class. Went to gym. Met Agas there. Was reallyyy hungry, so went to BK at arts canteen. Amazing view from top floor of arts canteen!!!! Good food as well. BK, Thai food, Coffee joint and cosy sofas, view of sea in the distance. Then went to library to get some books. Was supposed to print posters, but then decided to attend Agastya and naweed’s class – Sustainable Product development.  Nice module- project based. But I want to take neural nets so not taking this one ( cant take 5 modules..that will be too much!)….Anyways during break went to canteen where we decided to meet up on sunday for discussing some robot plans and the other 2 guys have swimming classes. They went back to class, while I went back home to check whether Home Team NS is open for public or not. the last 2 times we went we had to return due to some ongoing- league over there. Anyways today was open and I informed everyone to come down. 10 people . We waited almost 70 min to get our lanes- Super Rush! Then we played. First game was so so.. Second game we played EEE team vs Rest of Waste. As expected we thrased the Rest badly. Vanga was in form and the EEE spirit brought the best out of most of us. I was average. Bowling finished and we all dispersed. Ankur challenged to beat EEE team next week, same place, same day, same team!! I am looking forward to that. ( Guys any pictures of bowling?? Please pass on..) Got chicken pie and chicken puff from FairPrice Express. At the moment of typing, those were still uneaten, but the aroma tempting me to end my post here.

Before I go offline…few more things…tomorrow meeting Suchit at NUS…some work..at 330 got University Cricket team trials….evening house party at agastya it seems…Agastya will be at Attica i think…Sunday meet naweed and Agas, discuss about our robot and I would like to see Agastya swim ( have seen him run, play cricket, bowl…can it be worse?? and how? …just kidding agas!)

Other facts.

Reading List presently. Will keep you updated on my progress on each book weekly)

1. Academic Texts. 5 of them. :p

2. Service robots.

3. Leonardo’s Lost Robots.

4. The Dain Curse & The Maltese falcon  ( Both Mystery Novels)

5. Great Sanskrit Plays.

6. Mahabharata : Book 1 : the Book of the Beginning.

7. Bhagavad- Gita  As It is

8. Camel Club

Yeah I read a lot of books simultaneously!

Songs I was addicted to over the week:

1. Jalte hain from Sorry Bhai.

2. Emosanal Attyachar and Nayan Tarse, DevD.

3. Nee ToliSariga from Santosham (telugu)

4. Mad World, Both Gary Jules version and original by Tears for Fears

5. Aakasha Ganga from Vaana (Telugu)

6. Octavarium by Dream Theater.

7. Downloading DELHI 6 SOUNDTRACK, heard its good. Rahman again.

0224 hrs, Next to untouched Chicken Pie and puff!

Saturday, January 17th 2009.

NUS Graduate Students’ Society presents “NUS Welcome Party ’09″

Quick Update

January 9th 2009, Friday

2358hrs, Dining table@Home.

Been a bit busy last few days so wasnt able to post anything. Anyways today I thought I would just post some quick update before going to bed. Need to wake up early tomorrow!

Well today was pretty interesting. Most of the day had GSS (Graduate Students’ Society)  work at NUS! In the afternoon went to the International Student Orientation. Good opportunity to meet new grad students and make friends. We also promoted GSS and its events. Our next event is NUS WELCOME PARTY 2009 at Bora Bora Club, Sentosa on 24th January 2009 ( Any of you interested??) ! So yeah, we sold a few tickets for the party and also got people to become members of GSS.

Met this girl from India……super-cute!!!….Hopefully I will see her around somewhere in campus! :p …hehe

After that we packed up our booth, counted the money we made (I think arnd 800 dollars), gobbled some free food that was there and then made a move to GSS room. We had a meeting at 6pm. We discussed about the party and other events we were planning for this semester.

We decided probably to go for a cultural trip to Malaysia in Feb. Everyone suggested a lot of places. Michelle suggested A Famosa. So I guess most probably we are going there! (Anyone been there?) Btw we are going to Bali in summer…fully sponsored trip..yaaay!!

This is the last weekend of holidays…from Monday got classes!!….and GSS work!!…but I will try to post regularly….thats it for now (Its short by my standards I knw )

0013hrs, Still dining table

January 10th, 2009, Saturday.

Will Smith – Aati Kya khandala!

Between Sunrise and Sunset

5th January 2009, Monday

2213hrs, Home.

“My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and I go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can.” – Cary Grant

After today I completely agree with the great actor Mr Cary Grant.

Today was a good day. Not that I did anything exceptional, but because of the fact that I occupied myself the entire day, a rarity for months. I woke up at 8am.

Sun was shining bright, which made it a ‘ Good Morning ‘ for me. Somehow whenever the sun shines bright I  feel energised. I guess that fact  justifies my name. To maintain allegiance towards my new year resolution (to get the perfect body) , I had decided to go to gym today. But like a good aspiring bodybuilder I needed to have the so called ‘ Power-Breakfast‘ . Having gone through numerous sites yesterday night I had decided what I was going to have for breakfast. I had a multiple-egg omelette, whole-meal toast, ” low fat milk + oatmeal + raisin +banana + apple + apple cranberry muesli cereal ” and coffee. That breakfast itself was enough to exalt me to a state of euphoria.

Shit, shaved and showered.  Then with a clean-shaved face and flashing a big toothy smile I made my way to the bus-stop. Then I had the first weird moment of the day.

I was sitting alone at the bus stop. I saw an old man  at a distance, walking towards the bus stop. As he trudged his way towards me, I imagined how it would be to be that old, like a withered leaf, as pale as death. He came and sat next to me, a wrinkled-face man,  with a stooped posture, he looked to be  around 80+ . I admired the fact that he was strong-willed enough to roam around alone, but sad that he didn’t have any company. I stared at him, he stared at me, no words exchanged. I don’t know why I was staring at him,  but I know what I was staring at. I was staring at his deep eyes, wrinkle-contoured face, but more than that maybe I was searching for a 80yrold image of myself  in him. Screech!! My bus had arrived and I made my way into the bus, yet still thinking about the old man. I got the closest window-seat and immediately looked back at the man before the bus could zoom off. As the bus left the busstop, the old man smiled at me, not as toothy as mine, but a sincere one. I guess he also had mirrored his younger-self in me or probably not. Whatever be the reason the old-man and the bright sun had made my day.

The gym was practically empty. Three other people were there, making the total tally 4. One gal on the treadmill, whose face I couldn’t see as she was facing the window the entire time I was there. Yeah, she had a good derriere (ass). Another guy, who looked liked a veteran bodybuilder powered away at the gym machines. He was surprised at all the innovative exercises I was doing, which are with courtesy due to the extensive research I have been doing in the last few days. The third person reminded me of Vanga. No, he was not that thin but his mannerism in the gym was Vangaesque. He spent 90 percent of his time looking at the mirror admiring himself. And no, his body wasn’t even good. The guy had a paunch for gods sake! Then made my way to the shower. Then the  second weird moment of the day happened.

Old man at the shower room

In the corner of the room was the old man, the one who is always at the gym shower room whenever I go. He sits there always, motionless,speechless and ghost-like. I decided to take his picture. He didn’t react. I went to the shower-area and put my towel over the door. I had forgotten shower-gel, so I turned around immediately to get it…..he was gone. I was taken aback, he had gone so quickly and quietly. For an instant my mind wandered on thoughts of whether he was a ghost, but then I had taken his photo,had’nt I? I assured myself he couldnt be a ghost.

Went to Cheers and got myself two chocolate milk dabbas and gulped them down, as protein replenishment. Had an uneventful lunch at Engineering canteen and moved my ass to the library after that.

Random browsing at the library computer for next few hours. Some interesting things that I learned today:

- Robot fish (Video)

- New two-sided cricket bat, which will be used by David Warner (new Delhi Daredevils IPL recruit as  well) in upcoming matches in Australian Domestic Twenty20. Picture below.

Two sided bat for twenty20 cricket by Gray Nicholls

- Saw the Betfair pink pigeon race as part of  the Jane McGrath Pink Day at Sydney Cricket Ground. The pigeons were named after Channel 9 commentators like Tubby (Mark Taylor), McGrath, Warnie, Ritchie etc. Bill Lawry also a commentator is apparantely a pigeon entrpreneur! Anyways against all odds Tubby (the fattest pigeon) won the race, that too in record time of 52 min approx. More details here : Pink Pigeon Race Australia. Video at Channel Nine WWOS website : Cricket- Pigeon Pink Race link.

- Glenn Mcgrath might have retired, but his son, James Mcgrath, 11yr old is starting off. He was seen bowling to Hayden at the Milo cricket tents at SCG. Hayden, in the bad form he is , was bowled by McGrath Junior as well. Later on Hayden was heard joking, ” He is already quicker than Glenn, but the line and length is also there!”

When I shutdown the comp I was in for a surprise. The computer went in a very sci-fi movie-ishtyle computer generated voice , “ Initiation Shutdown Sequence in 1 minute. ” Hmm…Well atleast NUS library did some fancy change to their otherwise pathetic computer terminals. And yeah they started a computer registration system, like our EEE-ihub in NTU.

Meanwhile in Chennai, Sachin Tendulkar toyed with Saurashtra bowlers in Ranji Semi-Final match and retired after his century,ostensibly ill, but in reality I guess he was bored. Scorecard : Scorecard : Mumbai Vs Saurashtra.

Before I returned home I went to the arts canteen to have a cup of tea. It was raining. Great weather. Mast Chai. I sat at the edge of the canteen,very close to the rain, with a view of the beautiful Pasir panjang  Harbour. Third moment.

Rain in the air...Smoke on the water.

Smoke from the ships was rising against the falling rain forming smoke-clouds over the sea. I mumbled, ” Rain in the air, Smoke on the water, Kya pata Kal ho Na Ho.” I looked at the girl, she was staring at me, I did the same. She was gorgeous, sitting there in the canteen with her hair waving in the sea-breeze. It smelled of rain , it smelled of smoke, it smelled of wet mud – a brilliant amalgamation which resulted in a sensory explosion. I continued looking at her, and then suddenly she left with someone. I had a “You’re Beautiful – Moment” (Video)  I slowly shifted my gaze towards the horizon in the distance, imagining the non-existing sun set.

“Know what you want to do, hold the thought firmly, and do every day what should be done, and every sunset will see you that much nearer the goal.” – Elbert Hubbard.

Life

The Modern Drunk

January 2nd 2009, Friday

2348hrs, Home.

New Year Celebrations are still going on and might go on for few more days. Meanwhile everyday morning I see ‘hangover’ and ‘splitting headache’ updates on Facebook. Looking at these updates made me think why people drink alcohol  so much?

After some thought I realized that most of my friends drink regularly and get drunk. More pondering on the same topic and I realized that the world is run by people with hangovers. The President of USA is a drunk, most corporates engage in ‘social drinking’  every night and so on. I mean, obviously the world will go into recession when guys with major ‘hangovers’ make the big decisions in banks,governments etc.

Anyways then I thought why think about all those people when I can think about people around me who drink. So I gave it a thought. Since I came to Singapore I have seen most of my friends booze and smoke. Some of them are so ridiculous they make holiday plans based on the prices of booze and cigarette at those places (hence Langkawi).  I practically myself dont drink or smoke, since I never found a reason to and have always been fascinated to know why they did. Most of them are very proud that they drink.  So over the years I asked them for reasons. I will now list down some of their responses. Some of them very innovative and some insanely stupid. Many of them said, ” I don’t know.” But its just because they dont want to reveal the reasons. For all those “don’t knows” I  will state the more than obvious real reasons. I am not stating any names here, I guess if you are smart enough you will figure it out, atleast recognise your own reasons of getting drunk!

The List

1. It’s cool to drink. ( honest response, stupid reason though)

2. Everyone in my family drinks, so do I.

3. No one in my family drinks/smokes, I want to be the first one.

4. I am broke. ( highly stupid response)

5. No job, No girlfriend. ( how is drinking gonna help?)

6. Its New year’s Eve and I want to be so drunk I don’t want to remember any of the celebrations.

7. I feel like a ‘real man’ .

8. All my friend’s drink, so I thought i should as well.

9. I like copying western culture, its so hip to drink! (unsaid reason)

10. It helps my bowel movements in the morning. ( one of my ex-roomate’s reason)

11. My New year resolution is to remain high on booze, smoke and crack. ( Latest one I heard)

12. I just realised I wasted the last three years on drinking, girls and doing nothing. (Senkang wanderer)

13. Baap Ka Paisa hai yaar, party on!

14. 20′s are meant to get high and enjoy. ( Really??)

15. I am an alcohol-enthusiast.

16. Just out of curiosity. ( when will the curiosity end?)

17. I want to die at 40.

18. I like puking in cabs,public places.

19. I am more confident when I am drunk, so much so, I can throw TVs out of buildings.

20. I want to be like Kurt Cobain and Jimi Hendrix. (Best of Luck!)

21. If I don’t hunt the booze, the booze will surely hunt me. ( !!!!!!)

22. Let’s face it: modern life is a shit storm and booze is the only umbrella without any holes in it. ( Innovative answer, but again no sense in it)

23. Drinking acts as a “social lubricant” for me.

24. Only when I am drunk I can spank a girl in a club! ( You know who!)

25. Its Wednesday! and then its Friday! ( 2 reasons every week to drink!)

There are lots more. I guess you might have been able to relate some of the above reasons with yourselves. Anyways any more reasons please let me know!!

I did some research on why humans started drinking alcohol in olden times. Initially alcoholic drinks were used for nutritional and medicinal qualities as well as religious ceremonies. But over centuries people lost any sane reasons to drink, and started drinking just for the sake of drinking. Hence, the Modern Drunk was born. But then what the hell, your body,your wish. Happy Drinking!

0046hrs

January 3rd, 2009.

01-01-2009

1455hrs ,  January 1st 2009

Home.

One of the most laid back New Year Celebrations yesterday. Was supposed to meet Suchit and Vanga but thanks to my stupid phone couldnt meet them. Thinking whether to buy a new phone or just use Suchit’s old phone for now ???Or  New phone for the new year….maybe thats the way. Lets see. Anyways so was at home all night. Had some good dinner, watched a few movies and went to sleep after that.

Woke up in the morning today and did some New Year cleaning, yes still alone, still no help from flatmates. Then went down to check the letter-box. It was overflowing with mail, most of which were ad papers, old tenant mails and bills. Got some mail from NUS as well. One was my exam results. Present GPA : 4.5 . Decent.

Another mail was about subject registration. I so wanted to take the Advanced robotics module but wont be able to since it clashes with my core module …Grrrr… So thinking of going for Neural Networks. Classes start on 12th January. Cant wait for that, getting bored sitting at home! This semester will be busy…classes on mon,tue,wed,thur and saturday! Only free on Fridays.

Some fucking Graduate Employment Survey from NTU also in the mail, 3rd reminder mail, they have even called me 3-4 times to fill it up. Maybe I should just do it now. Anyone else of you got this thing???

Meeting Suchit tomo to get his phone for now. Thats the update for now.

Happpy New Year to all!

1509hrs.